In this episode I talk about how to interpret your feelings as a guide map. Move towards what brings you peace, clarity, and excitement, and move away from things that give you “confusion” or that make you feel uncertain, anxious, angry, or even luke-warm.
We all have an emotional scale that ranges from 0 to 10; 0 being things that we are ice cold about, 5 being things that we are “meh” about, and 10 being things that really excite us. When we move towards people, places, and events that are in the 9-10 range, our lives really start to work–and that’s when we begin to live a life of purpose on purpose. It helps to start getting in tune with your emotional scale by starting with things that you aren’t emotionally invested in. I give the example of my couch pillows. I really like everything about them, and they are a 9 or 10 for me, whereas ballpoint pens are about a 2 or 3 for me.
Once you get a baseline for how some everyday items feel, then start going around your house (especially your closet!) and ask yourself how certain items feel. Then move up to examining how you feel around certain people in your life–your neighbors, your aquaintances, your friends, your family. You’ll start to notice that the more emotionally invested you are in certain people, places, or things/situations, the harder it gets to be honest with yourself–and that’s normal. But the more you practice this, the more you will start to notice when something is off, and the easier it will be to distance yourself from harmful people, places, and things, and the more you will appreciate and gravitate towards those people, places, and things that “juice” you.
Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: email@example.com (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).
The live streams happen every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST over on my YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/thriveafterabuse and they run for about 2.5 hours.
If you are looking for support, I have two support groups (both are free). The first one is on my website: www.thriveafterabuse.com/forum and the second one is on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse (it is a closed group, but please make sure to read the group rules before you post so that you can change any privacy settings you may need to in order to stay safe).
Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general? You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:
My goal is to educate, empower, and inspire other abuse victims in understanding more about what happened to them (and how to prevent it from happening again), as well as how to go on and rebuild an amazing life.
Even though I have had a lot of "in the trenches" experience with highly manipulative people of all kinds, I consider myself to be a student of Narcissism, mindset, motivation, healing, and life in general, and am by no means an expert on any of these topics.
It's for these reasons, that when you are reading my information that I encourage you to hold to what helps, and let the rest go.
Latest posts by Dana (see all)
- Episode 69: What are healthy boundaries? - September 25, 2017
- Episode 68:My boyfriend doesn’t care about my feelings. Is he a narcissist? - September 22, 2017
- Episode 67:Do you have any tips for how to get my narcissist friend out of my life? - September 20, 2017