Episode 9 of the “Ask a Question” Show: Is Flirting With Someone Else Worth Breaking Up Over?

FAQs about Narcissists


In this episode Lisa asks if her new boyfriend’s flirting with waitresses should be a red flag and a deal breaker, or if he just needs some “training” on how to act.

I give my two cents, and I hope that you’ll give yours too in the comments down below. Let’s see if together we can help give Rachel the feedback and support she is looking for, so she can move forward in getting the clarity that she is seeking.

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, doctor, attorney, or expert in Narcissism…or anything at all really. If anything, I am a student of life, love, behavior and behavior change.

My experience and input comes from being a former advocate of victims of domestic violence, a former victim of Narcissistic abuse, and from (currently) being a psychiatric nurse.

* I am moving away from using the term “Narcissist” as I find it only seems to add a tremendous amount of confusion to things–not to mention there’s a very solid chance the word will be removed from the DSM here in the near future. Instead, I want people to focus on what matters, and that is the behaviors of people that I’m now referring to as “manipulative, dangerous and destructive people”.

I’m on a personal mission to share all my lessons learned from highly manipulative, dangerous, and destructive people in order to help YOU get all the clarity, closure, and healing you need in order to avoid, and recover from, these kinds of people.

Remember: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And yes, you really can heal from this.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Frustrations? Ideas? Need some support? Just want to say hi? Let me know!

dana@NarcissistSupport.com

Get Support: www.NarcissistSupport.com/forum

Find Me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Narcissist-Support/864636096909000

All manipulative people have about the same predictably unpredictable behavior. The good news is that they all come with the same set of red flags.

Learn the red flags and empower yourself with the knowledge you need to help you steer clear of toxic people:

 

Follow Me

Dana

I am a self-help junkie, former advocate for victims of domestic violence, current psychiatric RN, as well as being a recovering victim of Narcissistic abuse.

My goal is to educate, empower, and inspire other abuse victims in understanding more about what happened to them (and how to prevent it from happening again), as well as how to go on and rebuild an amazing life.

Even though I have had a lot of "in the trenches" experience with highly manipulative people of all kinds, I consider myself to be a student of Narcissism, mindset, motivation, healing, and life in general, and am by no means an expert on any of these topics.

It's for these reasons, that when you are reading my information that I encourage you to hold to what helps, and let the rest go.
Follow Me
About Dana 252 Articles
I am a self-help junkie, former advocate for victims of domestic violence, current psychiatric RN, as well as being a recovering victim of Narcissistic abuse. My goal is to educate, empower, and inspire other abuse victims in understanding more about what happened to them (and how to prevent it from happening again), as well as how to go on and rebuild an amazing life. Even though I have had a lot of "in the trenches" experience with highly manipulative people of all kinds, I consider myself to be a student of Narcissism, mindset, motivation, healing, and life in general, and am by no means an expert on any of these topics. It's for these reasons, that when you are reading my information that I encourage you to hold to what helps, and let the rest go.

4 Comments

  1. First we need to define flirting in this situation. While I have no doubt there are those guys out there who take advantage of a woman trying to make a living in the hospitality industry, most of the intelligent ones know this and are merely polite in return. All heterosexual men look at other women. It’s how we are programmed. The good ones will not ogle or flirt, but merely look like they would a beautiful art piece in a museum, and move on. The jerks will flirt, and they will do it right in front of you, then act like you are crazy for getting upset. I am just concerned if this young lady overreacted to politeness, or she underreacted to extreme rudeness towards her. If the guy was definitely flirting, I say dump him like the hot potato he thinks he is.

  2. Hi Dana
    Maybe we could use the term selfish, self centered, or self absorbed person instead of narcissist? Asshole comes to mind too. Lol! Just a thought.

  3. Hi Dana, I’m a recently new follower. I am 2 & 1/2 yr out of a 17yr marriage to an undiagnosed NPD. My recovery involved education and intensive therapy for 2yrs. I recently had a work colleague tell me she saw me flirting with a man. I have no intention of dating anyone ATM and would only date a fellow Christian. The man I supposedly flirted with is not Christian. I was horrorfied to think I had been flirting. I hadn’t even thought of such things and said I don’t know how or don’t remember how to flirt 18+ yrs is a long time to be off the market… So I now know from experince it is possible to flirt wihtout realising. I do agree with most of what you said though and my answer would be if you have any concerns it’s time to end it. I have had 3 failed long term relationships. With the 1st & 2nd relationships my gut reaction or first impression was to stay away but I got caught up in the doting attention and companionship then settled for less than what I new I deserved. A mistake I won’t make again. I’ve decided if its not right then I’d rather stay single. I don’t ‘need’ someone to make my life right. I would love someone but I will not risk getting into a bad relationship again. My guess is the fellow in your question & answer knows what he is doing but the fact that she doubts is reason enough to get out. I think what I’ve learned is we should end a relationship because it doesn’t feel right to us not based on something the partner does or did because then it gets into judging and blaming. This time I am going to decide what is best for me rather than what ‘feels’ good. I said to the work colleague, ‘I like chocolate but it doesn’t mean I should eat it every day.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.




Time limit is exhausted. Please reload CAPTCHA.