Projection is where a person (subconsciously) takes their “uncomfortable” thoughts, feelings, and actions and “projects” them (like a movie projector) onto someone else in an effort to ease themselves of the cognitive dissonance that their thoughts, feelings, and actions cause them. When people are projecting their behavior they are often largly unaware that they are doing it.
Targets of narcissistic abuse tend to do something that I refer to as “reverse projection” (not an “official” term). Reverse projection is where a person “projects” all of their good thoughts, actions, and/or morals onto someone else who doesn’t actually have these traits (as seen by their pattern of problematic behavior such as chrnoic lying, cheating, siphoning funds/stealing, etc.)
Both forms of projection are problematic, but if we are holding onto hope that a narcissistic person can change–when all their actions point to them not sincerely being interested in changing, then we will continue to be dragged through hell until we can’t handle it anymore.
…Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air), and I’ll see what I can do!
Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general? You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:
My goal is to educate, empower, and inspire other abuse victims in understanding more about what happened to them (and how to prevent it from happening again), as well as how to go on and rebuild an amazing life.
Even though I have had a lot of "in the trenches" experience with highly manipulative people of all kinds, I consider myself to be a student of Narcissism, mindset, motivation, healing, and life in general, and am by no means an expert on any of these topics.
It's for these reasons, that when you are reading my information that I encourage you to hold to what helps, and let the rest go.